Multiparenting Cayen & Cayson

Cayson picks up things real fast . That also means that when he sees his beloved brother scream in excitement, he also did - for the whole day！ And I'm pretty certain that as of 9 months, he officially knows I'm Mama and can call me that. Though some renditions go like "mum mum mum" instead of "mama".  He can clap on demand , or when he's happy, when food is yummy or when I sing the Bingo song. He will open close his hands to ask you to come or to ask for things. And he will also hi five and wave goodbye , though his wave is via an open close hand . He loves his task of waking up his brother every morning and takes it very seriously. It's almost like his bio clock also registers that now too.  He also have separation anxiety when I leave in the morning. Perhaps it's made worse as I've been seeing him very infrequently nowadays as I couldn't make it home before his sleep time at 7.30pm and I only have 5-10 minutes in the morning .  And he

My Filipino helper wanted to go back home earlier ahead of her two year contract. And then, there's the flurry of activities that ensued as I need to figure out how to help her sort out her home leave admin stuff . So here's some things I learnt as I fumbled my way through.   Statement : OEC (overseas employment certificate) costs only $3 .  https://www.philippine-embassy.org.sg/labor/overseas-employment-certificate-oec/oec/ Fact 1: Applying for OEC at the Filipino embassy in Singapore costs $97.50. $3 is only one of the elements. Once it's applied, there's a certain validity period and during the time when her employment contract is still valid, subsequent home leave can be processed at $3.  https://www.philippine-embassy.org.sg/labor/hsw/oec/ Fact 2: She can apply for POEA back home in Phillippines. The way she had applied for when she first arrived was valid only for 3 months so she needs a fresh one. If she applies for fresh one back home, she may be asked to buy so

We never used to have helpers all our lives. It was only with the arrival of the second one that we decided to take the plunge. As taking care of the baby is the main priority, these were the criteria I used in doing the selection and some questions that I asked : - have their own children (ideally not too young as they may need to go back often. - have prior helper experience in other countries (like Saudi Arabia or something) , Singapore is ok but it might mean she expects to have 4 off days per month or have certain expectations or habits.  - any prior medical condition like sprained back etc (might mean hard to take care of babies) - tell them you have 2 kids, and need to do a lot of work (lazy ones will scoot upon hearing this) - your expectation of their scope (C ooking? Children? Household ? Pets? Or more? Paint the most realistic picture you can) - ask why she want to work in sg (usually those who work for their children's education are more motivated)  - your expectation a

Babies This is super tricky for young babies. Too much nap in the day , they can't sleep at night. Too little nap in the day, they will keep stirring at night too. So for Cayson now who's around 9 months old, he needs around 3-4 hours of day naps to sleep through the night from 7.30pm to 6am. Anything less, he is likely to stir through the night or wake up from 4am onwards.  4 year old Recently Cayen's behaviour has improved leaps and bounds, touchwood I believe the terrible 3 phase is over. We did a lot of things in the last one year -  rewards charts ,  incessant reading of books promoting good behaviour, role play , executive functioning classes and sleeping 1 hour earlier every night.  While there's occasional tantrum flares, usually I notice it's due to missing the day nap , or sleeping too late (past bedtime). As such, my hypothesis is that sleep is one of the key drivers to good behaviour because kids so young need enough sleep. I recall his peak tantrums kin

It's my first business trip overseas in a long while. So, I have lots of insights on various matters.  Movies  Rewarded myself with the famous La La Land after doing all my required pre-reading. This movie is  highly recommended if you are into dreams and all that jazz. Watching it reminds me that actually I like watching movies , just that I haven't watched such interesting, stirring ones in a while. Also, when I am watching on a plane, I don't have that nagging feeling that I'm prioritising the two-hour movie over my kids, so that felt good too.  On my return flight, I squeezed in the classic Wall Street, Mr Church (incidentally with some jazz element too), and one episode of Sex & the City. All very nice too. Recommended too if you are into  good plots , without all the special effects and lousy humour.  Facetime Tried to callback every night and every morning to FaceTime the boys.. Interestingly Cayson doesn't seem to recognise me, or perhaps the just-got-ou

I read about some lush virtual rainforest thing at Art Science museum last week and so we headed there last Saturday as the pictures look cool. However, it was a little of a disappointment as it was all viewed via the handheld tablet. Being an ex Pokemon Go player (even if it's for two days), I wasn't that impressed . Cayen was sufficiently impressed as he could see animals popping up depending on where he turned. Since we were there, I decided to check out the exhibition called "Journey to infinity" since Cayen likes the word infinity. The queue was superbly long as we were there at 2pm plus - bad idea . However, since my MBS membership card (anyone can apply for free) gives 1 for 1 tickets, I decided to join the horrible queue. (Online purchase will allow one to skip the queue actually.) Anyway, we finally entered the museum after 30 minutes of queuing. I was very intrigued by the exhibits but I had to zoom at record speed as Cayson wasn't into the

As it has been a busy week with my global boss in town, I didn't do justice to capturing Cayson's milestones. So here it is : - he can move towards his objects (or subjects I.e. us) in a very fast speed in his walker. - he has distinct preferences about the foods he likes and doesn't like. Loves pears , biscuits, anything sweet and uncooked fruits. Turns his nose at avocado and not so sweet fruits (even apples are not favoured) - he can do hi-five now. - he will clap his hands if you say 拍拍手 - he likes to play with balls and kick balls  - he can crawl now though he tends to use rolling to reach his destination faster - he still is sleeping at 7.30pm every night .. Thank goodness!   - he likes swimming .. Even if the water is so cold !  - he uttered papa but not sure if he truly knew what it was - he still likes to climb onto people

Cayen went downstairs to the pool with my helper today to do some skate scooting as they couldn't find us on 14th floor. I was told that he stood there , saw Xavier in his home and beckoned him to come down to join him on the 5th floor. That's the first time he did that (he arranged his own play date!) and I was impressed by the great leaps he has made recently in forging friendships. He had a great time with Xavier as they examined millipedes and even spotted a grasshopper. He was also scooting much faster than before, perhaps due to positive influence from Xavier.  Later on, both of them went to another neighbour's house to play and i was happy to know that he was able to play very well with them.  When I finally picked him up half an hour later, he didn't want to go. He wanted to stay with his friends and play with shadows in the bedroom where they are hunting for some animals. (This is ironic as he's always saying he doesn't like the dark every